IT'S ALL RIGHT

Last night Frances picked a book off one of the shelves of our home library, opened it up and brought it over to me. The book she chose happened to be 25 Things Every New Mother Should Know, by Martha Sears. It was given to me by my own mother shortly after Frances was born during a brief (but super intense) period of time when I was really struggling with the newness of motherhood. 

They say, "ignorance is bliss" and with the exception of the typical pregnancy discomforts and nuisances (heartburn, fatigue, hormonal roller coaster rides, etc...) being pregnant with Frances was relatively blissful. Once Frances was born and I had a few days for reality to settle in, it quickly occurred to me that motherhood would be the most difficult (albeit amazing, wonderful and rewarding) challenge I'd have to face at this point in my life (which I realize means I've had a pretty great life, and I have). 

This time around, pregnancy has been much different for me. I now know what I'm facing and how my life and priorities will quickly and drastically change within just a matter of minutes. I'm also dealing with (what I realize are normal) feelings of guilt about the time that baby number two (who we'll be naming Spencer) will be taking away from my time with Frances and about how Spencer won't be reaping the same complete and undivided attention Frances received from Todd and I during her first couple of years. Mix in escalated hormone levels and you might say that lately I've been a hot mess. 

Coincidentally, Frances happened to have the book open to the above page when she handed it to me. And, of course, I cried. How did she know that's exactly what I needed to hear? Rereading the book grounded me (for the moment) and reminded me that this new challenge ahead of me will also bring new amazing, wonderful and rewarding experiences that will far outweigh the difficulties and that I CAN and WILL continue to be the best mother I know how to be. Thank you my sweet Frances.